If you had to choose either happiness or safety, which one would it be? Most choose safety. That´s why there are so many people who don´t feel empowered and whose life doesn´t feel good. Safety is tricky trap of the mind and mind tells to look for it outside of yourself. From things like money, relationship or being accepted. But real safety can never be found outside, it´s inner knowing.
Chasing safety in life comes from the perspective of limited mind and is based on fear. Someone tries to have certain amount of money to feel safe. Only to find out that there is not enough money in the world to bring that feeling. Another one chooses to stay in unhappy relationship because they are afraid to be alone. Happiness can´t be found while living from fear and making choices based on it. It´s just not possible. They come from different sources, happiness comes from heart and fear from mind.
It took me years to take a leap of faith and choose happiness over safety. So I´m not saying it´s an easy choice. Safety means different things to different people. For example it can be a job that pays the bills but one hates, relationship that is alright but not amazing or doing what is expected instead of following heart´s desires. It takes time to build up enough frustration, that you are finally ready to make a choice. Choose heart over head.
It´s alright to choose safety. But then you need to understand that happiness in it´s purest form is unreachable. So at least you can give yourself permission not to try to chase happiness all the time. Because you will not experience it with safe bets. You might get a glimpse of happiness but it will not be permanent.
But there is also third option. That is being happy AND feeling safe. How can that be achieved? In my experience it happens when you start doing the inner work. Connect to yourself in a deeper way and find a place inside where you always feel safe. We all have that in us. You can for example meditate and tell yourself to tap into a place, where everything is always okay. Experience how it feels and what it tells you.
Sense of inner safety is not bound to any outside factors. You can feel safe even when your savings run out. You can feel safe even when somebody dumps your ass or you dump theirs. You will feel safe no matter what mommy or daddy says. Feeling of being safe inside is with you at all times. And it can never be taken away.
With love, Kaisa
Kaisa W Koskinen, Spiritual Coach
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