Everyone wants to feel that they are in charge of their lives but very few feel that it´s true. We get so caught up in living from outside impulses that we forget how to live from the powercenter we already have in us.
How many things in your life you think that you NEED to get done and do? I would stop right there with the word need. Basically when you are telling yourself that you need to do this and that, what you are really saying is "I hate to do this, but I´m forcing myself anyway." No wonder life feels pretty shitty from doing things day in and out from thought energy like that.
So how to shift gears and start to feel that you actually CHOOSE what you want to do and put your energy into? With self-empowerment. What I mean by empowerment is that you start realizing that nobody other than yourself is making you to do anything. You actually are the chooser of everything you decide to do. It´s just easy and unresponsible to outsource that to someone else like a spouse, kids or boss. But in reality nobody is forcing you to do anything in your life. And all the expectations you try to live up to, are really just your own expectations for yourself.
It´s pretty empowering and at the same time rough to realize that life´s choises are all on you. In all honesty there is nobody else to blame or outsource decisions upon. It doesn´t matter what your parents told you, it doesn´t matter what your hubby tells you, it doesn´t matter what your boss tells you to do. YOU choose if you are going to do things what they say or not. Good realization is also that usually expectations from outside are not the problem. The problem is expectations you have placed on yourself.
So it´s time to stop playing a victim and be always stressed out about life. Unless you really want to play it like that. You are the chooser and the creator of your experiences, so start empowering yourself by taking the responsibility back home. Responsibility of your state, mood, thoughts and what you do in daily life.
Minimise or eliminate things that are not working. If you hate cleaning, hire help. If you hate your job, start looking for new one. If you are in a unhappy relationship, get out. Maximize things that make you feel excited, alive and joyful. Create something new to your daily life, that feels amazing. Start a new hobby or start reading a book you´ve been interested about. Meet that friend frequently you enjoy spending time with. Learn how to paint. You know that if you don´t change something you do or think about daily, your life is not going to change. You already know what you are going to get out from living like the way you do now, so why not create something more suitable for yourself?
Follow your excitement and joy, they always lead you to right things. Trust that you have inner guidance at all times and it communicates with you by making you feel good or bad. Good feeling means YESSS more of this. Bad feeling means let go and try something else. So simple yet takes time to learn to trust and interpret feelings. Your future self will be thankful that you started practising today.
Kaisa W Koskinen, Spiritual Coach, Founder of Empowered Life
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